Dates are memorable (especially the first date). Whether you ask someone out or someone asks you out, the feeling is great and nervous at the same time. What should I wear? Should I offer to pick her up? Should I hug him casually when I meet him? What should I talk about? Shall I choose the place to meet or let him do it? Should I suggest the concert happening across the city?
You might have rehearsed the dialogue exchange in your head several times, but what happens in a date solely depends on how you are and how you project yourself. What you choose to be in that one moment or few hours seals the fate and the probability of the relationship. And that’s what that matters the most we guess.
So, don’t think too much, because, it’s just a date! We picked on 11 first date rules keeping in mind how important the first date is.
First Things First – KEEP YOUR SMARTPHONES ASIDE!
#1: Go Easy On The Proximity Meter
Even if you are an outgoing person and feel comfortable with a delicate side hug, we suggest a firm yet gentle handshake is the safest start to a first date. Also, you don’t want to come across as an overtly cool person. Many of us draw conclusions on the basis of how you are greeted by your date. If everything goes smoothly and you chance upon another date with the same person, maybe then you could try the delicate hug style.
#2: Avoid Any Awkward Silence
Silence at the right time and the right place is appreciated. And first dates are not the place where one would want to explore the beauty of silence. A first date is unpredictable like a question paper, you don’t know what to expect. It can be easy or become an equation that only Einstein can solve. Now, coming back to the awkward part, even if you don’t have anything to talk about, smile in between and try not to make the awkward situation look more awkward. Always, (we insist) always resort to small talks, they are the biggest weapons to help you not look like a douche!
#3: Do Not Interrupt
When your date is speaking about a particular thing which doesn’t seem to interest you, do not cut them short and drift over to a topic of your choice. This is out and out rude behaviour. Be a good listener and give your date a chance to speak. An interruption may put them off and result in an abrupt ending to a potential relationship.
#4: Do Not Ask Too Many Questions
When you are on your first date, it is natural that you want to know the person a little more. And this can only happen through asking questions. While it’s good to know what they like to eat, what are their hobbies, what music they listen to or what kind of movies they watch, but do not bombard them with your volley of questions. You may be asking them to know them better, but you don’t know how the other person is receiving this questionnaire sort of a game.
#5: Avoid Any Disagreements
On your first date, it is quite possible that whatever statement the other person is making may not sound logical to you. But do not be in a haste to prove them wrong by indulging into any sort of disagreement. Understand that they have a different pattern of thinking and presenting their point of view and it is not a mandate for them to match your wavelength. Be gentle even if you are disagreeing on something.
#6: Do Not Jump To Talking About The Future
So finally, the person you had been chasing for months agrees to go on a date with you. You are really happy. But when you go on that first date, and everything is settling and your date is talking nicely to you, do not scare them off by talking about your striking compatibility and how you should give this relationship a try. You don’t even know yet if the date would be interested in meeting you for a second time. So refrain from painting the picture of your future unless you are sure your date feels the same way.
#7: Do Not Talk About Your Past
You may have had a rough past and you are trying to get out of it by meeting new people and mingling with them. Or you may be a charmer when it comes to dating and all, but why would your date want to know that piece of intricate information. Speak about your past experiences if your date is interested in knowing about them or just let them be.
#8: Do Not Quiz Them About Their Past
Not everyone is comfortable sharing their past with a person they are on a first date with. Even if you have known the person for years and they are okay discussing it, wait till they say so. We are nowhere indicating that everyone has had a rough past. If your date is comfortable talking about it, only then play along. Keep away from quizzing them about their past relationships, their partner or why they broke off etc etc. Live in the present, make the moment special.
#9: Do Not Get Judgmental
The universal truth is everyone judges everyone. But then, give your date a break! And it is your first date. If your date says something stupid, or acts in an embarrassing way or calls for the cheque in a rude way, do not get judgmental and express it right then. You do have the luxury to go back to your friends and bitch about it later. And, you also have the luxury to say NO to this particular person in the future if he/she approaches you.
#10: Do Not Get Cranky About The Bill
Let’s face it. Men do not like their women paying the bill and women feel independent to let someone else pay for them. If we go by the ideal norms, it’s the host who is supposed to take care of it. You are settling the bill and for any reason, your date insists on paying too, so, split the bill amicably. Do not act in a way that it’s your birthright to pay that bill off. Your date could think that way too!
#11: Even If You Are A Foodie, Have Your Little Romance Later
Foodies share an unsaid romance with anything resting on their platter. They salivate about the food they have ordered, they get enticed by the very sight of it. If you happen to be a food lover, relish your food but don’t get engrossed in a way that you forget you are with someone. Have small talks in-between.
In the end…
While the things that we spoke about above apply to both the sexes, but here is one last thing neither the man nor the woman should ask – How was the date, hope you had fun!
Save it for later peeps.
For the guys, drop the lady back home and for the girls, refrain from slipping sugar-coated random fillers like ‘will call you soon’, ‘let’s catch up soon’, ‘next weekend, we are meeting’, ‘I will text you’ etc etc. you don’t know if you will ever want to meet him again or not.